Saturday, June 09, 2007

Zionist conspiracy…

Cranmer is indebted to the ominously Jewish-sounding Daniel Finkelstein of The Times, for discovering the hidden code to rival that of Da Vinci… that this:

…is really a hidden code concealing this:

…and is manifest proof of the veracity of The Protocols of the Elders of Zion; that there is a Jewish plot to blow up the Dome of the Rock and reconstruct the Temple of Solomon; that Jews were responsible for the September 11th outrage, which was a Mossad/CIA pretext for the invasion of Iraq; and establishes beyond doubt that Jews are the real power behind George W Bush’s crusade against Islam and intend to dominate the world through the elimination of democracy, control of the world’s oil, media, money supply, and the promotion of Kabbalah…


Anonymous Voyager said...

Do you really expect people to dignify such gibberish wioth reasoned comment ?

9 June 2007 at 10:05  
Blogger Cranmer said...

Indeed not, Mr Voyager, indeed not. His Grace was going to post on the sinister recruitment drive by the Freemasons to British universities, but decided instead to amuse himself with the trivial and inane.

Occasionally, one has to let one's hair down, even if His Grace's beard gives the appearance of it always being in that state.

9 June 2007 at 10:20  
Anonymous Blogfan said...

I heard about it on the James Whale radio show your grace, the truth will always out.

9 June 2007 at 10:44  
Anonymous Voyager said...

With a name like Oliver Lodge I think we could have more entertaining discussions about Masons and whether they really do worship Yahbulon and exert an extraordinary fascination for the bizarre. I hear Prince Charles refused to follow the family tradition so he won't be able to meet our polticians and judges with their hair down and trousers up sporting little aprons like demented leprachauns

9 June 2007 at 10:51  
Blogger Cranmer said...

Mr Voyager,

His Grace is perfectly content to dedicate this thread to matters Masonic, though he was only familiar with the anglicised version of their deity, Jebulon.

Doubtless the Mohammedans would assert that the Masons are involved in the worldwide Jewish conspiracy somewhere anyway.

9 June 2007 at 11:23  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

I say 'Let your hair down!' Your Grace. You deserve some fun. And I see you are already having it with your frivolous comments about the Mohammedans.

9 June 2007 at 11:44  
Blogger The Hitch said...

You can laugh , but its true, jew do control the world agenda.
They are a cult not a race.

9 June 2007 at 14:34  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

The Hitch -

Explain yourself.

9 June 2007 at 14:55  
Anonymous Miss Jelly bean said...

Hitch, I send you my sympathy. Good luck with your explanation!!! Let's see how you get out of this one. No doubt Cranmer is all amusement.

9 June 2007 at 15:33  
Anonymous Miss Jelly bean said...

Then again, snuffy, I'm sure Hitch was just joking. Maybe he's just trying to amuse himself with the 'trivial and inane' like Cranmer.

9 June 2007 at 15:51  
Anonymous B. Taylor said...

I'm surprised his grace has much hair to "let down". I suspect that burning at the stake is pretty thorough way to remove hair.

9 June 2007 at 16:29  
Anonymous Miss Jelly bean said...

Speaking of hair, is it true that Jewish women shave their hair off and wear wigs? I just heard this a few days ago and am not sure whether it's true. Anyone know?

9 June 2007 at 16:38  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yep, we did it.
We're all very sorry and won't do it again.

9 June 2007 at 16:45  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sadly your Grace there are very many, particularly Guardian readers, BBC employees and those of the Mohammedan "faith", that truly belive that which you have posted in jest.

It is a strange world in which the best golfer is black, the best rapper is white and the worst anti semites are the otheriose rabidly anti racist left wingers.

9 June 2007 at 17:33  
Blogger The Hitch said...

Ms Bean
Ladies of the orthodox Jewish persuasion do indeed shave their heads or at least keep their hair very short for reasons of modesty.
Human being being human beings they get around the rules with elaborate wigs, just as they get around the no work on the sabbath rule with such tricks as delayed dialing telephones.
The rumours that they enjoy congress with their husbands whilst draped in a sheet with a strategicaly placed hole are false.

9 June 2007 at 17:37  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

Miss Jelly Bean - As I understand it, Jewish women, like Muslim women, wish to cover their heads. Instead of cloth, they use wigs.

Oh Anonymous I am so tired of hearing this blanket accusation against Guardian readers, and the BBC, simply because they dare to criticise Israel!

And the best rapper is no longer white. Get with the times.

9 June 2007 at 17:43  
Anonymous Voyager said...

is it true that Jewish women shave their hair off and wear wigs? I just heard this a few days ago and am not sure whether it's true. Anyone know?

It is the very Orthodox Jews whose wives reveal their natural hair only to their husband, and so have a wig made to cover their natural hair for wearing in public.

In the cases I heard about the wig seemed to resemble their natural hair, but such is orthodox ritual. Some religions shroud their women in winding sheets rather than behind a screen as the original practice implied.

9 June 2007 at 19:03  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

Voyager - I'm not sure they have to be very Orthodox to do this. I have known Jews who do this who don't consider themselves to be Orthodox.

I am interested - Tell us more about the winding sheets.

10 June 2007 at 00:14  
Anonymous jamal said...

Make jest as you will. This type of logo must be removed. Even if the comparison was innocent, the link has been made and to keep it would be to support Zionism.

Sign the petition to change the Olympic Logo

10 June 2007 at 04:27  
Anonymous Voyager said...

Hair covering

10 June 2007 at 07:51  
Blogger Cranmer said...

Mr Jamal,

Welcome to His Grace's revered blog of intelligent and erudite religio-political discourse.

He has been waiting for a Mohammedan to arrive who actually believed this logo to constitute evidence of the ubiquitous 'Zionist tentacles', as your own post asserts, which is evidence, if any were needed, of the paranoia at the heart of your belief.

10 June 2007 at 09:20  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

2. Ahmed Ismail
1. Jamaal Udeen

Two signatures......

10 June 2007 at 10:12  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

Thank you Voyager. As His Grace has officially stamped this blog post as a place where one can 'let one's hair down', I feel I can safely say that I often wish I were any number of religions, just so I could cover my hair.

Miss Jelly Bean - Do you cover your hair? I have tons of curls going in every direction and it takes much effort maintaining a glamorous look. Where does one buy scarves to cover hair? I most definitely need one for bad hair days.

I have wanted to wear one too, as an experiment, to see whether people would treat me differently in the street. With my head covered, I think I would easily 'pass' as an Arab, and I wonder how different my daily experiences would be...

So Miss Jelly Bean - help me in my quest if you can. Or will I be told off by Ahmed, Jamaal and Jamal for being hugely disrespectful? If I am being so, I do apologise. I was inspired by His Grace's own act of freeing his hair into wanting to confine my own...

10 June 2007 at 10:32  
Anonymous Miss Jelly Bean said...

Snuffy, non-muslims wearing the hijab is not disrespectful. I see lots of non-muslim women wearing different types of head covers. (but they wear them slightly different to the way muslims do). It no big deal to me, I couldn't care less.

You have bad hair days? That reminds me of the numerous times my politics teacher constantly accused me of having bad hair days. he obviously tried to annoy me but it didn't work (well, from the inside I would be screaming 'insufferable man!'). I myself find it so much easier to manage my hair wearing the hijab cus it's tied up and out of my way, but of course, I don't have curls like you.

Oh, here's a thought! Imagine Cranmer wearing a hijab. He'd look so cute!

10 June 2007 at 11:03  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

Miss Jelly Bean - You see lots of non-muslim women with head covers? What do you mean? You mean in the way that would suggest a religious affiliation? Or you mean just wearing a fashionable scarf? And what do you mean they wear them slightly differently? Is that deliberate or is that because they don't know how to wear them properly?

10 June 2007 at 11:21  
Blogger tim said...

Voyager and others have already said that it's only some Orthodox ladies who do this, but I was going to submit this as proof that it wasn't universal: This is the web page showing my friend Ilana Harrus as winning the "Luxuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists™ Woman of the Year 2002/3."

10 June 2007 at 12:15  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

Your Grace - You have inspired me to write about scarves on my own blog. You must take a look.

Tim, I maintain, although I have no 'proof' of this, that I have known Jewish women who wear wigs who are not, and do not consider themselves to be Orthodox.

As with Islam, I was under the impression that some Jewish women choose to cover their heads, and some don't.

10 June 2007 at 12:20  
Anonymous Observer said...

Dr. Harrus's hobbies include writing, movies, and bicycling

what more could one wish in a woman.....and supernovas to boot....if only one could meet such desirable young women ....with their own hair and teeth

10 June 2007 at 12:49  
Blogger Hettie said...

On the topic of head covers I really like the way Benazir Bhutto covers her hear.

10 June 2007 at 15:58  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

On the topic of head covers I really like the way Benazir Bhutto covers her hear.

It is a lot more than she managed at Oxford....I hear none of her hair anywhere was covered

10 June 2007 at 17:43  
Blogger tim said...

Huh. Never known of an example, but then I've never met an Orthodox girl who did, either. Could be!

Start going to the American Astronomical Society conferences and the like. (I reckon for you it would be easier to go to Royal Astronomical Soc. meetings.) That's where I met several of my girlfriends and, finally, my wife. Female astronomers tend to be cute. And they come with Ph.D.s!

10 June 2007 at 20:55  
Anonymous Voyager said...

I reckon for you it would be easier to go to Royal Astronomical Soc. meetings

I have always thought I could attend either as honoured guest in view of my insights


10 June 2007 at 21:50  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

HA! Voyager, you made me laugh out loud. Looks like you are well in there...

10 June 2007 at 22:12  
Anonymous דָנִיֵּאל said...

Hello everyone...just looked in and what a shame that this had to greet me. How could anyone believe such rubbish? In my opinion publishing this type of material only serves to spread anti-Semitism and increase the idea of Zionist conspiracies. Ideas like this one should not be regarded at all.

Touching on the topic of head coverings, Halacha (Jewish law) requires married women to cover their hair. The most common hair coverings are the tichel (scarf), and the sheitel (wig). Not all married women cover their heads but this goes against Halacha.

10 June 2007 at 23:35  
Blogger tim said...

I'd agree, except the original article's comment (linked above) was so obviously kidding (and written from a pro-Israeli point of view) that nobody could seriously think the Olympic logo was a Zionist plot.

...and then Mr. Jamal went and did.

So...your point is taken. But I don't think it actually spreads antisemitism, so much as exposes it where it already exists. Like using a cockroach trap with a lure.

11 June 2007 at 04:49  
Blogger Snuffleupagus said...

I am so pleased my claim that Jewish women who are not Orthodox can, and do cover their heads, has been proved to be correct.

11 June 2007 at 20:30  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Newer›  ‹Older